Surviving Your Partner

Finding new interests

STAYING PUT

You may shudder at the thought of some of the drastic changes and challenges outlined in the last chapter. There may be all sorts of good reasons why they are not for you. However ready you feel to move on into a new life, you may be either unable or unwilling to change your job or your home.

Perhaps you don't want to change your home because

1. You prefer to live amongst memories of your relationship with your partner.
2. You are quite content where you are and know that you would be unlikely to find a place anywhere else that suits you so well.
3. You have children whose school careers would be disrupted by a move.
4. You know that a move would only add to your feelings of insecurity.

Perhaps you don't want to change your job because

1. It is a job you thoroughly enjoy and you have worked hard to get to your present position.
2. You earn a salary that you couldn't hope to equal if you started again elsewhere.
3. You enjoy the company of your colleagues and have happy relationships with them that you wouldn't want to lose.
4. You have children and your work has been arranged to fit around their needs.
5. You are nearing retirement and your age and pension arrangements make a change either difficult or unwise.

Whatever your reasons, you are going to stay put, but you still feel that need for new independence, you want to make changes in your life.

A SUMMARY OF 'FINDING NEW INTERESTS'

1. You may want to try out new interests and there are plenty of things to choose from.
2. If you have found that you don't like an activity, or you haven't time to do everything, you can always give it up.
3. Holidaying alone brings special problems but there are solutions.
4. Friends or family may try to put you off doing new or unusual things.

DISCUSSION POINTS OF 'FINDING NEW INTERESTS'

The discussion points at the end of each chapter aim to help you to relate the subject matter to your own circumstances. Suggested ways of approaching the issues are given in a separate section at the end of the book.

1. Have you a mental list of activities you would like to try?
2. Would you be put off by people telling you an activity isn't suitable for you for some reason?
3. What kind of holiday would suit you best now that you are on your own?

Please note: These are extracts taken from the book, 'Surviving Your Partner'. If you would like to buy the book please click here